Okay, let me first say that I'm in a much better mood right now than I was when I last wrote. Not much has changed, but it really is crazy how even in the same circumstances, we really have good days and bad days, often for no particular identifiable reason. Yesterday was a bad day. Today is a good day. So far, John and I's bad days haven't fallen on the same days (for the most part), so I'm glad for that. I'd love to just have the good days, but, really, who am I kidding? This is probably the CPE talking, but I'm pretty sure the important part is to be wherever we are, to experience it, and to be honest about instead of trying to put on a smile and forget that, well, we're pretty much living our biggest fears (among other stressful life events as well). If you've never read the poem "See Paris First," I suggest you check it out. I don't know the author, but it's used in a bajillion sermons, so if you just google it, you'll be able to find it. I love it, and it's where I am right now. Let's go ahead and face our deepest fears - because once we've done that, what can stop us? Okay, enough preaching. I really just wanted to get on here and tell you all about one of the best of the good days, brought to us by the Christ Church staff.
Last week, itty bitty baby girl Hill got her baby shower! We had a couple of showers planned here and there, but when we found out about BH's condition, we put everything on hold, which made sense, but as a first-time mom, I have to say, that was one of the things I was most excited about. Those of you who know me well know that I love to open presents (seriously, you could wrap up a box of Kleenex and give it to me, and I would be thrilled to open it), so I'm not going to deny that I loved that part of it, but even more so, of course, I wanted the chance to celebrate and enjoy our baby girl. Even though she's not here yet, and we've only seen her on the screen, she's already our baby daughter, and that's just how it is. I guess I suspected that I would feel that way, but I wasn't sure. Now that I've seen, heard, felt, and know her, she's my baby, and I'm her mother already - no matter what happens. And so having a shower for her is another way of recognizing, celebrating, and loving her. And the wonderful staff at Christ Church gave us that gift. And it was wonderful.
Of course, it was a little bit bittersweet. We were overwhelmed (which doesn't take much these days!) by their love and generosity, but I know that in the back of everyone's mind was the question of whether this particular baby will get to use these particular gifts. (And their gifts for her are so precious! I've never seen so much pink! It really is amazing that any of us gals turn out to be tomboys, given how much pink we tend to be dressed in in our early days. We'll have to see how her personality turns out - but if she's a pinky girl, she's set!) But they gave anyway. They showered us anyway. And they, like us, already love little itty bitty anyway, already. And all of their love for her and us made the shower bittersweet in another way, too. These wonderful, beautiful, fun, and festive individuals have supported us in all kinds of ways over the past two years, from helping us settle in, getting used to working in a church in the "real world," humoring us and our dog parties, encouraging our respective ministries and growth, and just plain being our church family. And now we're leaving. However convinced we are that moving to the great state of Tennessee is best for our family and moving us closer to God's call for the next phase of our lives, it doesn't come without grief over what we are leaving behind. There is a lot to miss in Kentucky - and our fabulous friends and family at Christ Church reminded us of it last week!
I'll spare you my inevitably syrupy account of the shower and let the pictures speak for themselves (thanks to Susan Williams, who has done more to document our family celebrations than we have!) - but make sure you check them out and oooh and aaaah with us - especially over the multi-talented Patty Groot's incredible bassinet cake! Thanks, Christ Church friends! We love you!