3

I just put my 3-year-old to bed for the last time.  In the morning, she'll be a 4-year-old.  Bittersweet.

Three seems to get a bad rap.  I think I've mentioned on here before than when working with other people's kids, I have found 3 to be one of my favorite ages.  Numerous friends assured me that it would be different when it was my own child being ridiculously stubborn and emotionally (and physically) out of control.  And we definitely had plenty of awful 3-year-old moments.  Becca is not a mellow kid.  :)  But 3 has also been, by far, the most entertaining age.  Her little mind is so busy making connections, and you never know what she is going to pop out with next.  For example, on the way home today, she said, "When boys come to my house, I'm going to punch them."  What what?  She's a trip.  If I'm wearing black, she pretends that I'm Ursula (of Little Mermaid fame) and runs away.  Obnoxious, yes.  Hilarious, yes (for a while).  Tonight after John got her out of the bath, she ran around the house naked and hid in the pantry.  Dripping wet.  Crazy kid.

Anyhow, Becca's third year has been a good one for us.  She's done pretty well health-wise, she's made a LOT of progress on eating, she's grown fairly well, she's made progress in school, and she'd getting close to being fully pee-potty trained (not so much with the poop).  Considering where we were 4 years ago, praying for a few wonderful minutes with our sweet girl, I'll take every single one of the 2,101,290 minutes she's been in this world...even the obnoxious ones.

Some recent shots of 3 in all its glory...

Sleeping in her humongous big girl bed, passed down from another Rebecca at church!

Modelling her Big Sister shirt she made with Miss Becca

Tinker Becca

Ready to swim!

Strawberry pickin' with Grandma

First braid!  Her hair is finally long enough!

Becca and Daddy pretending to be Lady and the Tramp.  That's amore!

Our Happily Ever After

Okay, this time I have an excuse to go nearly a month without posting.  I didn't want to put it out there in the blogosphere before the trip, and all my energy (other than that spent fighting one helluva sinus infection and, oh yeah, growing another human) was spent on preparing for our trip to...Disney World!

That's right, folks, the little miss, Super Dad and I took a rare family vacation with just the three of us and went to see Mickey Mouse live and in person (in mouse?)!  We had an amazing time, and I'll regale you with tales, bargain tips, and lots and lots of pictures later...but first I want to take a few minutes and tell you what it meant to us to be able to take such a trip.

I am 15 weeks pregnant now.  15 weeks and 2 days, actually - almost exactly as pregnant as I was four years ago when we first learned that something was wrong with our first pregnancy.  The doctor called with abnormal results from an AFP screen - the same test that I will be having done at our appointment on Wednesday.  The elevated numbers indicated that there *might* be a higher risk the our child would have spina bifida. 

Spina bifida, huh?  Not what you want for your child.  You want a beautiful, perfectly closed spinal column with no mysterious bumps or openings.  You want your child to learn to walk naturally, unimpeded by such a significant disability.  When you dream about the 10 perfect fingers and the 10 perfect toes and say that you don't care what gender the baby is, "as long as it's healthy," you don't dream about spina bifida.  Those test results were a blow.  But that was just the beginning. 

Spina bifida, we decided, we could handle.  It would certainly  not be ideal and definitely not the path we would chose for our child.  But we knew and know teenages and adults with spina bifida who are spirited, determined and fully independent - even more so than many of their non-disabled peers.  Even if our child's case fell on the more severe end of the spectrum, we would work with them, love them, shuttle them to therapy and do whatever it would take to enable them to reach their fullest potential.  And besides, there was this organization called the March of Dimes that helped kids with spina bifida.  That worked to fortify our country's grain sources with folic acid so that fewer kids would have to face the challenge of a compromised spinal column.  They helped families cope with the difficulties of disabilities related to birth defects like spina bifida.  And their website was the first one I turned to when we started to consider the potential diagnosis. 

But then we saw the specialist, and what we thought was a devastating potential prognosis quickly turned into a lethal one.  You know the story; when the doctor saw that Becca was already 2 weeks too small, she told me that my little girl was going to die.  Worst case scenario shifted from a VP shunt and life in a wheelchair to...nothing.

Nothing.  That's what we came to expect for our little girl's future.  Of course, we still hoped and dreamed and prayed and sang and started this blog, but as far as actual expectations?  Nothing.

No first cries.
No first smiles.
No first steps.

No pigtails.
No kindergarten.
No graduations.

And certainly no family vacations to Disney World.

We didn't give up.  We did everything we could to give her a chance.  But we knew that whatever life we did get with her was gravy, as we like to say in the south. 

People like to say that Becca is a miracle.  I'm not going to dispute that.  But my understanding of the most miraculous part of it all is that as we didn't give up on her, this child that we had already come to know and love, neither did thousands and thousands of people who had never met her.  While we were singing our "Grow, Grow, Grow" song -- and in the decades before Becca even came to be -- doctors, nurses, researchers, fundraisers, parents, neighbors, kids collecting dimes enough to stretch to Washington were working to save her.  Our Itty Bitty.  And I truly do understand that work -- all of that work -- to be miraculous, inspired by God and brought to fruition through the gifts given to these people through God. 

Because people like President Franklin D. Roosevelt decided to use their substantial power to benefit others, Becca is alive.  Because people like Dr. Mildred Stahlman care enough about the babies they would never even meet but whose lives they would save, Becca is thriving.  Because our every day heroes like Drs. Prince and Weitkamp and nurses Millie, Heather, Leigh, Stacy and Carla, who believed in the tiny fighter the had before them when it would have been easier to write her off as another non-viable fetus, Becca is the spunky, tenacious girl she is today.  And because of people like you, who take a few minutes and a few dollars to pay it forward to benefit the itty bitties of tomorrow - like the one I'm carrying right now! - Becca got to meet the princesses. 

Our family is living our happily ever after.  And we hope that continues to be our story as we move through this second pregnancy.  As with Becca, there may be challenges, but we know that whatever life we get -- all of us -- is gravy.  Our family is fortunate, lucky and blessed beyond measure by our little girl and the love and support of our great cloud of witness.  And so this year, at the Nashville March for Babies on Sunday, April 22,

We march because every family deserves their happily ever after.

Please join us, physically or in spirit, by becoming a part of Itty Bitty Becca's Team at www.marchforbabies.org/BeccaHill.

Any size donation helps, and the more who can join us on the day of the walk, the merrier!  We'll be selling t-shirts soon, and if you have a small business, leave me a comment with your contact information, and I'll fill you in on some awesome sponsorship opportunities - starting at $150!  

As loyal readers and dear friends, you have walked with us through the tumult of the past 4 years and into our happily ever after.  I hope that you will take this chance to continue walking with our family by joining us or donating to our team's goal.  Your support truly does make a difference - to me, to John, to Becca, to the little booger in my belly, and to the thousands of babies born each day too sick and too soon.  Thanks.   

Pigtails

Becca at 3

Yep, that's right!  Itty Bitty Baby Becca is now THREE YEARS OLD!  Is anyone as aghast at the fact as I am?  I mean, when I think about my pregnancy, her birth, the NICU, etc., it seems like a long time ago - that could have happened 3 years ago.  But for her to be a 3-year-old?  No way.

But she definitely is!  How do I know?  Because of the questions!  For some (blessed) reason, the "why's" haven't started yet, but all. the. time. I hear, "Wass dat noise, Mommy?"  "Where going, Mommy?"  "Who's dat, Mommy?" and (possibly the cutest), "How you today, Mommy?" 

Three can be known as a tough age among parents.  I've always particularly loved 3-year-olds.  They are just getting to the point where you can have a real conversation with them, they are inquisitive (see above), and they are starting to play pretend and be more interactive in their play. Yes, they are also amazingly defiant and tedious, but I have preferred that to the know-it-all-ness of 4-year-olds and 2-year-olds' inability to communicate.  I'll go on record at the beginning of this 3-year-old year as saying that I love having a 3-year-old.  We'll see how that affinity develops (or deteriorates) as we move through the year, eh?

I want to save all of her medical and developmental updates for another post and dedicate this post as a snapshot of Becca's personality at the moment.  (And, as we know, the 3-year-old personality can change on a dime!)  So here's Becca at 3:

• Becca LOVES people.  Her first word was "hi!", and she remains as social as she was back then.  She is very mom-clingy right now, but once she's separated from me, she'll play and talk with anyone.  I see us introducing the concept of strangers very soon, though I kind of hate to do it. 
• She's very polite.  Kind of.  I mean, she'll scream bloody murder if you don't do what she wants, she'll stomp and collapse on the ground and throw a fit, etc.  But she loves to say "please," "thank you," and "you're welcome."  Oh, and "fuffe me," which roughly translates to, "Excuse me."  She particularly loves to say thank you and will say it about 15 times before she moves on.  She even thanks the elevator for taking her to another floor.  Seriously.
• She's still a water baby.  I'll have more photographic evidence of it for you later, but she loves all things water.  Bath, pool, hose, and, of course, drinking the delicious no-calorie water. 
• She's funny.  She's got a great sense of humor and loves to laugh and to make you laugh.  Sometimes she just laughs because it feels good.  She loves to be silly, and particularly loves to be a scary monster and roar at you, and THEN erupt into a full-body laugh. 
• Becca doesn't care about eating but loves chocolate chips.
• She's just really gotten the hang of playing pretend, so toys like her kitchen and dress up outfits are getting some new use.  She particularly loves to sell ice cream out of the window of her playhouse that Nana and GG got her for her birthday. 
• She's definitely in another Mommy phase but has SO MUCH FUN playing with Daddy.
• About 65% of the time, she wants to be an astronaut.  The other 35%, she wants to be a doctor.  I did hear teacher mentioned once.
• She's great at puzzles and like everything to be in its place.  Very John Hill there.  (Oh, and that's another question I hear a lot: "Wheres dat goes?") 
• Becca loves music and is a dancing QUEEN.  Specifically, she is the dancing queen of  a small South American village where they drum, stomp and spin a lot.  It's quite the sight to behold. 
• The current PBS obsession is "Sid the Science Kid."  I used to find this show annoying, but it's grown on me.  Especially when Becca walked up to the front door and said, "Science kid in the hoow-uuuuse!" 

I could go on, but I'm hungry and what you really probably want is pictures anyway.  So here you go!

At Sesame Street Live, doing what she did a lot of the show - not paying attention!

Wagon ride to the beach!  (More beach pics to come.)

Scaring the alligator!

Sporting her new dragon p.j.'s. 
She seems to prefer the boys' pajama patterns more than the girls'.  Whatever!



Pretty in pigtails!

Easter 2011

Pretty girl in her pretty dress...maybe not a deeply theological treatise on Easter, but, really, nothing drives home the point of Jesus' victory of life over death to me more than a beautiful, growing girl who was supposed to die.  Instead, she dresses up purty for Easter and exclaims, "Jesus is ayive!  And painting!" while ringing her alleluia bells.  That's sermon enough for me.  Now exactly WHAT Jesus is painting, I have no idea.  Couldn't be much prettier than this:

When I started putting this bow on her, she said, "Too big!"
I told her that no bow is too big for Easter.  :)

Self-portrait with Mommy

Buster is jealous that he didn't get a pretty Easter dress.

HAPPY EASTER!

And remember my favorite liturgical public service announcement: 

Easter is a season, not a day - so I'm not late!  :)

Update on Itty Bitty Becca's Team

It's t-minus 7 days until the 2011 March for Babies!  (And, in case you are wondering, that's exactly why the Becca blog posts have been so few and far between as of late.  But have no fear - I have been snapping pictures and videos to upload and share with you when my schedule is a little bit back to normal.)


So how is Itty Bitty Becca's Team doing?  Quite well!  In 2009 and 2010, we averaged about $1500.  This year, we are already up to...wait for it...$3710!  WOW!  That's 247% of our average!  We've made a big jump this year by branching out with our fundraising efforts and by having more of our team members reach out to their friends and family to raise funds, too - big thanks go to Ashley, Christy and Emily, who have raised almost $600 among them!  Our team is consistently tracking in second place among the Music City family teams, but there are 3 teams right on our heels.  I think it's going to come down to the wire!  The first team place is over $10,000, so I don't think we're going to catch them, but we could hold our second-place position with a solid final week push!  (But I'm not competitive or anything...)  


I've revised our team goal up to $4,000, which solidly ranks us among the top family teams.  We are $290 away from that goal, so I think we can make it - but of course, we need the help of all of our favorite procrastinators...so if you've been meaning to give but just have gotten around to taking the time to do so, take a minute now and donate at www.marchforbabies.org/ittybittybecca.   That's Becca's personal fundraising page - I've set it up so that she can be a Top Walker herself (that's the VIP status for walkers who raise over $1,000) - after all, she is the most important walker on our team!  :)


You may be wondering how the triathlon training is going...and I've been meaning to give it a dedicated post, but since I haven't gotten around to it yet, I'll give you the skinny here.  So, first off, let me say that it's going well-ish, and I'm confident that I'll be able to complete the race, as long as there isn't a time limit they haven't told us about.  :)  But let me introduce you to my new best friend:

Yep, after all of the concerns about Becca's lungs, I'm the first one to be diagnosed with asthma!  Wohoo!  Of course I'd rather it be me than her, but I'd prefer that none of us have to deal with it.  I had some really super minor asthma issues as a kid, and according to the pulmonologist (yep, the first time Becca met a pulmonologist was at my appointment - ironic!), it's not unusual for it to come back in adulthood.  Turns out things like training for a triathlon bring such issues to light.  I've got the "rescue inhaler" above that I take when I need it and/or before working out, and we're trying out a maintenance inhaler that I take nightly.  They both seem to be helping but they haven't exactly made the problem disappear like I had hoped.  That's probably a little too much to ask for, but we'll see what the doc says at my follow up in a few weeks.

So, needless to say, that set my training back a little bit.  Add to that John's being sick over a couple of weekends and Becca's impromptu hospital stay and subsequent recovery, on top of the busiest season at work, and I haven't exactly hit my training goals, especially not in terms of the Tri's for Tri's fundraising.  Right now my fine sponsors owe a whopping $3.35 for every dime sponsored, which is far from my original goal of $15 per dime and still far from my revised (and much more realistic) goal of $10 per dime, so, for all those sponsors willing to bear with me, I'm extending the fundraising period until up to the triathlon.  That gives me about an extra month post-March for Babies to hit the training hard and make up for some lost time.  In retrospect, that's what I should have arranged from the beginning, but I'm not sure I really conceived of how busy the weeks leading up to March for Babies would be.  And since we can collect March for Babies money through the month of May, the dimes will still count toward our team total.  Sponsors, if you're not on board with the extension, feel free to cash out now at www.marchforbabies.org/ittybittybecca.  Otherwise, know that I'll be working hard to earn your dimes - staring next week.  :)

Our team t-shirts should be shipping to me tomorrow, so I'll probably be able to start handing them out at church on Wednesday.  If you haven't yet paid for your shirt(s), you can send me a check or drop me an e-mail or facebook message, and I'll give you instructions on how to pay through PayPal.  

And just in case you need a reminder of why we Itty Bitty Hills are working hard for the March of Dimes, see below.  The money we raise gives other mommies and daddies the chance to cuddle with their little lambs, too. Thanks for all your help!

And the Winner Is...

Peace Love Ribbon Christmas Card

Create beautiful photo Christmas cards at Shutterfly.com.

View the entire collection of cards.

Card #2! Thanks for all you input! All three designs had their fans, but in the end, the balanced composition of #2 won out. Enjoy the finished product! (And please don't be offended if you don't receive a card in the mail; we are doing family only this year...unless I get a surprise offer of employment from an early Santa. :) ) Wishing you each and all peace, love and joy this Christmas and throughout the year!

Christmas Is a Season, Not a Day...

...and that's what I keep telling myself as the days of December click along without my getting ready for Christmas! Well, I guess I'm not doing too badly, thanks to my on-the-ball husband. (Okay, I admit it. His organized neuroticism can help me out at times.) We got the house decorated last weekend, and we've established a family Advent calendar tradition, which involves M&M's, making for one very happy little girl. I've actually got nearly all our shopping done - just some photo presents left to produce and order for the grandmothers. And that brings me to my final big project for the season: The Family Christmas Card.

Even though we are on major austerity program at the Hill House these days, I HAVE to send out at least a few cards. I always agonize over our Christmas cards, which I've only started sending since Becca was born. (That means that "always" means the past 2 years...which often feels like my entire life!) She's just so darn cute and adorable and any card I'm going to send out has to reflect her beautiful face and soul, and, frankly, not many card designs are good enough for my girl's face. (I'm sure you other moms know what I mean.) Not to mention the fact that, hey, I'm a pastor and see the card as an opportunity to give a gentle reminder of the true meaning of Christmas. (I'm not opposed to either the traditional secular Christmas symbols (Santa, etc) or to more generic holiday cards (especially since not everyone on our card list celebrates Christmas), but I do notice the theological nuances to certain card designs.)

But this year is easy! First off, our friend Jessica Kelley snapped some AWESOME pictures of us at in a somewhat impromptu photo session at Crockett park. When I saw this picture,

I knew I was looking at our Christmas card photo. So perfect. Such a Becca face. So full of joy and that Advent sense of expectation. And her bow even looks good. (I make them myself, so I get a little picky about that.) Usually just selecting the picture takes days, but before I even saw the rest of them (many of which would have made adorable cards, too), I knew this was the one. Step one, done.

Next I had to decide where to have our cards printed. I've used several different websites in the past, but have generally been happiest with the products I've gotten from Shutterfly. I particularly love the Super Hero birthday invitations I got from them for our own Super Baby's 1st birthday party. And so when I heard about this blog promotion, I knew we had a winner. You know how I love a good deal...and good pictures of my kiddo! Step two, done.

And here I am with step three...and I need your help. I've got to select a card design. This is usually the hardest step because it's difficult to find a design that works well with the chosen image, is theologically appropriate and matches our family's style (not too fancy or formal). However, Shutterfly's 2010 collection is so vast and varied that it was hard because there were so MANY great options! (You can see them all by clicking here (for Christmas cards) or here (for general holiday cards). I've narrowed it down to 3 options:

Card 1: Peace on Earth (their design names)

Card 2: Peace Love Ribbon

Card 3: Mod Love

I tried to share links for you to see them each with Becca's picture, but I can't figure out how to do it. It may not be possible (so as to keep you from just stealing their designs). But I bet you can use your imagination. Please do, as I'm letting my readers pick our family's card! I've set up a poll; it's in the right sidebar. Take a second to vote for your favorite design, and that's the one I'll order and send! Why, you ask, is such a control freak letting readers, many of whom are strangers, pick out our family's card? Because, of course, they are all adorable, so you really can't go wrong! :) Besides, I may never be able to decide without you. (In years past, I have gotten multiple designs simply because I can't pick a favorite. I might have issues.) I'll close the poll on Friday and call step three done.

Once you've picked my card, go check out the others to select yours! And remember, as long as we get them out in the 12 days of Christmas (which, by the way, begin with December 25th), we aren't late! :)

One More Thing..

I'm so used to Becca's modelling gigs (haha!) that I forgot to mention here that she's on the cover of the summer issue of Vanderbilt's "...On Their Way" magazine. The whole issue is about prematurity, and Becca shares the feature article with Dr. Mildred Stahlman -- yes, as in the Stahlman NICU -- the Vanderbilt doctor who adapted an iron lung used for polio patients to treat the first preemie ever saved through mechanical ventilation. (And, in an amazing story that some of you friends of this now grown up miracle preemie know, she is a friend and actually took care of Becca in the NICU - wow!) It would not be an exaggeration to say that Dr. Stahlman pretty much invented the field of modern neonatology.

See why I love Vandy?

Anyway, you can see the story online here. Click on her picture for the full story.

Sometimes I'm Amazed...

...that she is my daughter. What a lucky woman I am!

p.s. Photo credits to Grandma for this one!